A guide to all the insane predictions made by Google’s new engineering director

J

Juarez Peace

A guide to all the insane predictions made by Google’s new engineering
director

by Brad Reed
http://is.gd/Kianma

Google made a very important hire this past week when it decided to
bring on famed futurist Ray Kurzweil as its new director of
engineering. What makes the hire particularly intriguing is Kurzweil
is equal parts brilliant and insane: He is a pioneer in fields such as
speech recognition technology but he also thinks he will live forever
after he uploads his consciousness onto a computer.

After learning about the Kurzweil hire, I decided to take a peak back
at my copy of The Singularity is Near, Kurzweil’s most famous futurist
tome where he predicted that human beings would soon “transcend
biology†and traverse the universe as immortal cyborgs. In no
particular order, here are some of Kurzweil’s craziest predictions.

In the 2040s, humans will develop “the means to instantly create
new portions of ourselves, either biological or nonbiologicial†so
that people can have “a biological body at one time and not at
another, then have it again, then change it, and so on.†(The
Singularity is Near, Page 258)

By the late 2020s, we’ll be able to eat as much junk food as we
want because we’ll all have nanobots injected into our bodies that
will provide us with all the proper nutrients we need while also
eliminating all the excess fat we’ll gain from eating 20 bags of
Doritos every day. (Page 304)

By 2010, “computers… will become essentially invisible:woven into
our clothing, embedded in our furniture and environment.†Although the
concept of “wearable†computers has been tossed around quite a bit,
we’re a long way off from a time when Samsung (005930) will be ableto
sell its first Galaxy Sweater model. (Page 312)

At an undetermined point in the future, we’ll be able to beam
ourselves into another person’s brain and experience the world as they
see it, just as in the film Being John Malkovich. (Page 316)

By 2033, “virtual prostitution†will be legalized. (Page 318)

By the mid-21st century, people will evolve into “software-based
humans†who will “live out on the Web, projecting bodies whenever they
need or want them, including holographically projected bodies, foglet-
projected bodies, and physical bodies comprising nanobot
swarms.†(Page 325)

Kurzweil, who is now 64 years old, knows that there’s a chance that
his flesh body (or as he calls it, “Body 1.0″) could die before he
gets to upload his brain into a computer and fly around the world as a
swarm of nanobots. To ensure that he lives long enough to see such
technological marvels, Kurzweil says he takes “250 supplements (pills)
a day†and receives “a half-dozen intravenous therapies each week
(basically nutritional supplements delivered directly into my
bloodstream, thereby bypassing my GI tract).†(page 211)

While that may sound excessive to you flesh-based humans, it’s also
the price Kurzweil is willing to pay for a far-flung chance at
immortality. So while you may scoff at Kurzweil’s projections right
now, he may have the last laugh when you’re dying in a hospital and
he’s whirring about as a software-based human in Body 2.0.
 
H

Highway to Hell

Google made a very important hire this past week when it decided to
bring on famed futurist Ray Kurzweil as its new director of engineering.
What makes the hire particularly intriguing is Kurzweil is equal parts
brilliant and insane: He is a pioneer in fields such as speech
recognition technology but he also thinks he will live forever after he
uploads his consciousness onto a computer.

If you'd have told a 14th-century peasant that there'd be a huge merchant
class in the future who would sit in huge metal cylinders eating meals
and drinking wine while the cylinders hurtled through the air faster than
a speeding arrow across oceans and continents to bring them to far-flung
business opportunities, the peasant would have classified you as insane.
And he'd have been wrong to the tune of a few gazillion frequent-flyer
miles.
By 2010, “computers… will become essentially invisible: woven into
our clothing, embedded in our furniture and environment.†Although the
concept of “wearable†computers has been tossed around quite a bit,
we’re a long way off from a time when Samsung (005930) will be able to
sell its first Galaxy Sweater model. (Page 312)

A smartphone in a pocket seems to be close enough. And I saw a home
recently with small computerized gadgets inset into the *floor vents*.
Cloud-computing-connected TVs and other items are becoming commonplace.
Kurzweil, who is now 64 years old, knows that there’s a chance that his
flesh body (or as he calls it, “Body 1.0″) could die before he gets to
upload his brain into a computer and fly around the world as a swarm of
nanobots. To ensure that he lives long enough to see such technological
marvels, Kurzweil says he takes “250 supplements (pills) a day†and
receives “a half-dozen intravenous therapies each week (basically
nutritional supplements delivered directly into my bloodstream, thereby
bypassing my GI tract).†(page 211)

Has he also signed up for cryonics?
While that may sound excessive to you flesh-based humans, it’s also the
price Kurzweil is willing to pay for a far-flung chance at immortality.
So while you may scoff at Kurzweil’s projections right now, he may have
the last laugh when you’re dying in a hospital and he’s whirring about
as a software-based human in Body 2.0.

So Google hired Kurzweil. The really interesting question, then, is if
anyone's getting consultancies from Eliezer Yudkowsky ...
 
A

anyone

If you'd have told a 14th-century peasant that there'd be a huge
merchant class in the future who would sit in huge metal cylinders
eating meals and drinking wine while the cylinders hurtled through the
air faster than a speeding arrow across oceans and continents to bring
them to far-flung business opportunities, the peasant would have
classified you as insane. And he'd have been wrong to the tune of a few
gazillion frequent-flyer miles.


A smartphone in a pocket seems to be close enough. And I saw a home
recently with small computerized gadgets inset into the *floor vents*.
Cloud-computing-connected TVs and other items are becoming commonplace.


Has he also signed up for cryonics?


So Google hired Kurzweil. The really interesting question, then, is if
anyone's getting consultancies from Eliezer Yudkowsky ...

An even better question is, why did Google hire Mr. Kurzweil as Director
of Engineering? In most corporations, that job is largely about
management of people and resources -- in support of present business
activity and with a goal of anticipating and planning for future growth --
and not directly about science, technology & creativity. 'Strategic
Planning' (or similar) likely would have been a better choice.
 
L

Lew

Juarez said:
A guide to all the insane predictions made by Google’s new engineering
director

This is the comp.lang.java.programmers Usenet forum. Your spammy spam is off
topic, you spammy spammer and all who answered here.

Stop your spammy spamming, you spammy spammers. Shame on all of you.
 
L

Lew

Highway said:
If you'd have told a 14th-century peasant that there'd be a huge merchant
class in the future who would sit in huge metal cylinders eating meals

If you told a spammy spammer to stop spamming comp.lang.java.programmer,
they'd turn into a troll and disregard common courtesy.

I hope that isn't you.
 
S

Swifty

By the late 2020s, we’ll be able to eat as much junk food as we
want because we’ll all have nanobots injected into our bodies that
will provide us with all the proper nutrients we need while also
eliminating all the excess fat we’ll gain from eating 20 bags of
Doritos every day.

He's about 8 years out, as an eating regime published in May 2012 has
already brought this about. See http://www.swiftys.org.uk/diet.html for
the experiment that I'm running on myself.
 
R

Roedy Green

A guide to all the insane predictions made by Google’s new engineering
director

by Brad Reed
http://is.gd/Kianma

Google made a very important hire this past week when it decided to
bring on famed futurist Ray Kurzweil as its new director of
engineering. What makes the hire particularly intriguing is Kurzweil
is equal parts brilliant and insane: He is a pioneer in fields such as
speech recognition technology but he also thinks he will live forever
after he uploads his consciousness onto a computer.

After learning about the Kurzweil hire, I decided to take a peak back
at my copy of The Singularity is Near, Kurzweil’s most famous futurist
tome where he predicted that human beings would soon “transcend
biology†and traverse the universe as immortal cyborgs. In no
particular order, here are some of Kurzweil’s craziest predictions.

In the 2040s, humans will develop “the means to instantly create
new portions of ourselves, either biological or nonbiologicial†so
that people can have “a biological body at one time and not at
another, then have it again, then change it, and so on.†(The
Singularity is Near, Page 258)

By the late 2020s, we’ll be able to eat as much junk food as we
want because we’ll all have nanobots injected into our bodies that
will provide us with all the proper nutrients we need while also
eliminating all the excess fat we’ll gain from eating 20 bags of
Doritos every day. (Page 304)

By 2010, “computers… will become essentially invisible: woven into
our clothing, embedded in our furniture and environment.†Although the
concept of “wearable†computers has been tossed around quite a bit,
we’re a long way off from a time when Samsung (005930) will be able to
sell its first Galaxy Sweater model. (Page 312)

At an undetermined point in the future, we’ll be able to beam
ourselves into another person’s brain and experience the world as they
see it, just as in the film Being John Malkovich. (Page 316)

By 2033, “virtual prostitution†will be legalized. (Page 318)

By the mid-21st century, people will evolve into “software-based
humans†who will “live out on the Web, projecting bodies whenever they
need or want them, including holographically projected bodies, foglet-
projected bodies, and physical bodies comprising nanobot
swarms.†(Page 325)

Kurzweil, who is now 64 years old, knows that there’s a chance that
his flesh body (or as he calls it, “Body 1.0?) could die before he
gets to upload his brain into a computer and fly around the world as a
swarm of nanobots. To ensure that he lives long enough to see such
technological marvels, Kurzweil says he takes “250 supplements (pills)
a day†and receives “a half-dozen intravenous therapies each week
(basically nutritional supplements delivered directly into my
bloodstream, thereby bypassing my GI tract).†(page 211)

While that may sound excessive to you flesh-based humans, it’s also
the price Kurzweil is willing to pay for a far-flung chance at
immortality. So while you may scoff at Kurzweil’s projections right
now, he may have the last laugh when you’re dying in a hospital and
he’s whirring about as a software-based human in Body 2.0.

You are an ignorant ass. Kurzweil has a far better record of success
at prediction than other futurists. Read WHY he says what he says.
Just because it does not jibe with YOUR limited intuition does not
make it wrong. He does not just pull his predictions out of his ass.
 
L

Lew

Roedy said:
You are an ignorant ass. Kurzweil has a far better record of success

While I agree with your assessment of the OP, you fell for his bait.

I, too, answered, but in part to discourage anyone else from doing so, by
pointing out how far off-topic the post is.

I'm blocking this thread. I suggest everyone else do so as well.
 
S

spk


Paul.
Perhaps your use of "Google¢s" may have superceded
your use of excessive eroteme?
.... whatever, aspie wanker.
Message from your "the Murphy-Morphy" follows;
/begin
Do not begin what you cannot finish, Paul.
One name per newsgroup.
/end

Against Wills you were forced to employ all four socks...FFS!
"Wills V Wilson Derbyshire" http://off.st/DerbyshireCircus

Your H2H personality is busted, Paul.
Results 1 - 26 of about 26 for author:[email protected].
highway2hell http://off.st/OrS

Now we work on your "anyone" <ieGJnr4aQXRb!uzEL@z³> at
Astraweb. Helpdesk@Astraweb is most supportive of
"check this out" from grandfather'd members, dude.

I read Santa is maybe helping you onto the bus?
tip?
Resist resisting, you will feel better for it.

For you this Xmas in feeding your paranoia:
http://tinypic.com/r/2wqx1j5/6
 
H

Highway to Hell

If you told a spammy spammer to stop spamming comp.lang.java.programmer,
they'd turn into a troll and disregard common courtesy.

I hope that isn't you.

???
 
N

Nadegda

in <[email protected]>,Highway to Hell


Paul.

Obsessing again, kooky?

And get that ridiculous pair of nose glasses off, Murphy. Everyone
fucking knows who you are no matter how much you try to disguise
yourself. You might as well just post as "Murphy" from now on.
Perhaps your use of "Google¢s" may have superceded your use of excessive
eroteme?

Is that some sort of kinky sex thing? Pervert.

... whatever, aspie wanker.

More perversion!
Message from your "the Murphy-Morphy" follows; /begin
Do not begin what you cannot finish, Paul. One name per newsgroup.
/end

How ironic. You've just been active in alt.free.newsservers using both
"TOSEM" and "RF", kooky.
Against Wills you were forced to employ all four socks...FFS! "Wills V
Wilson Derbyshire" http://<FOOM!>

What the hell do your kooky delusions have to do with merchant classes,
metal cylinders, and the other stuff I see glossing over the rest of this
thread, Murphy?
Your H2H personality is busted, Paul. Results 1 - 26 of about 26 for
author:[email protected]. highway2hell h<FOOM!>

You're quite insane. Highway to Hell may not post much, but he's been
active for months now, and a semi-regular participant in AUK affairs.
He's clearly got his own identity. He just mostly lurks. Or maybe XNAs a
lot, though I don't recall seeing it.
Now we work on your "anyone" <ieGJnr4aQXRb!uzEL@z³> at Astraweb.

Have you gone *completely* out of your mind? What makes you think *that*
person is your Derbyshire phantom? You just keep jumping from one target
of kooky obsession to the next, don't you?
Helpdesk@Astraweb is most supportive of "check this out" from
grandfather'd members, dude.

ROTFL

I don't know which is funnier. Your claim that a company would breach
customer privacy with a nod and a wink if asked by "grandfather'd
members" or your claim to *be* such a member, when your reputation
*everywhere* is as a screedy delusional kook.
I read Santa is maybe helping you onto the bus? tip?
Resist resisting, you will feel better for it.

Is that some sort of a kookthreat directed at Highway to Hell?
For you this Xmas in feeding your paranoia:
h<MUSHROOM CLOUD>

That's rich, coming from a raving lunatic whose principal malfunction is,
quite clearly, paranoia.
 

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