Coding going wrong

Oct 22, 2019
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Hey Guys

I'm new in this forum and greet all of you! Currently I'm doing an apprenticeship where I learn about Photography, Graphic Design, Film editing and Web design. I love what I'm doing and it's very fullfilling (most of it). When it comes to coding something happens with me. I get very hard panic attacks. Something that otherwise never really happened in my life. I fall in a deep, almost like a depression like status. I cannot do anything and looking at a code makes me literally dizzy. I never really coded before in my life and in the beginning I was kinda looking forward to it but now it's literally horror! When I talk to my teachers they don't know exactly what to say other than giving me tipps on how I could learn it better but they don't want to understand, that I feel paralyzed and feel just awful when coding. It takes around 10min of coding and I feel like my brain was working for hours. When someone tries to explain it to me I know that I would understand but my brain just does not want to take in the information. It literally just shuts down. Luckily for a while I could dodge coding and concentrate myself on getting better at graphic design but the problem, that I am currently in a course where the goal is to make a very very simple website with html/CSS and bootstrap. This Website has to be connected with wordpress and it should consist of a home, about and contact where one of these has a dropdown menu. I'm really not a lazy person. I hit the gym 5x a week and can learn for hours when it comes to all the adobe programs (except dreamweaver).

And I am in a very horrible position right now because we had time to prepare for this course a decent amount of time but I concentrated on other things because at the one hand I didn't wanna get this crazy panick attacks and at the other hand it was impossible to ask a teacher or friend for help because of my brain just shutting up and me ultimately wasting their time. I promised myself I would be doing this course and really put the effort in but its the second day now and im failing miserably in a task that probably is stupid easy.


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